Saitou's Adventures in Babysitting
by donna8157
Summary: With Kenshin and Kaoru gone for the weekend and no one else available, Saitou is the only candidate left to baby-sit Kenji. Havoc and chaos abound at the police station. A three-chapter mini story.
1. A Tornado Hits the Police Station

**Disclaimer: **Rurouni Kenshin is the property of Nobuhiro Watsuki and Sony Productions.

**Author's Notes: **This will be a short fic consisting of only 3 chapters. Enjoy!

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**Saitou's Adventures in Babysitting**

**Chapter 1**

**A Tornado Hits the Police Station**

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He knew something was amidst when the ink had spilled all over the document he had been ever so careful in filling out since early that morning. He had loathed doing paperwork ever since he joined the police force and found it to be the most mundane and utmost irritating task that an officer such as him would be forced to do. Why couldn't this task be handed down to one of the petty officers underneath him? Saitou clenched his teeth at the thought that he would need to redo all that work that he had just started.

He took out another blank form from inside of his desk and swiftly dipped his brush into the ink bottle. He began to write his name onto the sheet of paper when he heard a light knocking on his door.

"Come in," he said without looking up from his paperwork.

A click of the door resounded and opened up. Soft rustling of fabric and a sweet smell of red poppies swept inside of the room. At that moment, Saitou knew exactly who it was that came. He looked up from his paperwork and found his lovely wife, Tokio, looking at him with a small basket in her hands.

"Anata, how are you doing?" she questioned as she gave him a genuine smile. Saitou's eyes lit up at hearing her voice.

"I'm doing well, Tokio. Is there something wrong?," he asked with concern in his eyes.

Tokio nodded. "Actually anata," she started, "I wanted to ask a favor of you."

"Anything," he said. Saitou instantly regretted it when he saw a bush of red hair pop up from behind Tokio's kimono. "What is _that _doing here?"

Tokio sighed as she motioned for the youngster to step out from behind her.

Yellow eyes narrowed as the boy revealed himself. The short-statured kid had long flaming red hair tied up in a loose ponytail like that of his father's. In fact, the kid looked like an exact replica of the Battousai himself except for his mother's blue eyes. He was wearing a loose off-white yukata and looked up shyly at the policeman while rocking back and forth on his small feet.

"Hello, Uncle Hajime."

Tokio smiled at hearing the young boy address her husband and lightly patted his head.

"The Himuras had asked me to look over their child since they're going on a short vacation this weekend. No one else would be around to babysit Kenji so I agreed to help. However . ."

Saitou lifted one of his eyebrows amusingly, "However . ."

"However, I'm going into town with Eiji and Takuya today, so I was wondering if you could look after Himura's son while I'm gone."

Saitou looked cautiously over at the chair with the young boy seated within it and saw that he was quietly listening to the conversation between the two of them wide-eyed. Tokio looked at the boy with a grin.

"You see how well behaved he is anata? I'll only be gone for three hours, I'm sure he won't be any trouble." Without giving her husband enough time to retaliate, the woman walked behind the desk and gave him a small peck on the cheek leaving him a bit dazed. She then walked back towards the door.

"Bye, Aunt Tokio!" Kenji waved as he bowed down politely. The woman laughed and responded by waving good-bye to him also. Before leaving out the door, she said good bye to her husband. Before closing the door, she turned back and added with a wink, "Oh and anata?"

"Yes, Tokio?"

"Please no smoking around the child," she added while smiling sweetly.

Saitou's mind numbed. A couple of minutes without that sweet nicotine just seemed . . it seemed so . .he couldn't think. He didn't even hear the final click of the door after his wife left. A few minutes later his wolfish eyes landed upon the red-haired child sitting in the chair across from him. The kid had a large grin on his face as he looked around the room. The officer wondered exactly what was going on through the young kid's mind. He never had much experience with baby-sitting someone so young since Tokio had raised Takuya mostly by herself. (A/N: Takuya is Saitou's son.)

Saitou decided that if the boy was going to stay like that, he could at least bear it. He turned his attention back to filling out the police report. He dipped his brush back into the inkwell and began writing his name.

_Fujita Go-_

His hand started trembling. _Damn it! _He tried to control the trembling but to no avail. He needed that cigarette. His hand started to mechanically move towards his coat pocket like it so often did.

"Uncle Saitou?" the little boy called.

Saitou clenched his teeth at hearing Kenji's voice. What now did the boy want from him? "What is it?" he sneered, without cigarettes Saitou felt uneasy and was quick to resort to violence. Within his hands were the packet of cigarettes that he so treasured as he looked at the boy across from him.

Kenji pointed to the cigarette pack that the man was holding.

The ex-Shinsengumi captain looked at the object and quickly shoved it back into his pocket. He couldn't disobey his wife! He grumbled under his breath as he went back to doing the paperwork. Filling out paperwork was already bad enough, but having to do paperwork without nicotine was like hell! There had to be something that he could do!

"Chou!"

Tokio had said that he couldn't smoke in front of the boy, but she didn't say that he couldn't smoke when the boy wasn't around. A few seconds later loud stomping was heard and the rustic jiggling of the knob was pulled. A man with gravity-defying blonde hair came in huffing and puffing out of breath.

"Whatcha want boss?"

Saitou's wolfish yellow eyes looked at the man with disinterest as he sternly pointed at the young boy across from him. "I want you to look after Battousai's kid since you never do anything of importance around here."

Chou's mouth dropped open as he looked over at the young boy who was currently grinning at him. _This won't be so bad_, he thought as he smiled back awkwardly. "Aww. That's mean Saitou. I do lots of work around here!"

Saitou didn't pay any attention to him as he got up and walked out.

_The cold-hearted bastard could at least act like I exist! _Chou clenched his fists and wrung it at him when the man's back was turned.

"I saw that," Saitou said.

_The bastard has eyes behind the back of his head!_, he thought. Chou wouldn't have been surprised if Saitou could read his mind. He sighed and then took the young kid's hand and pulled him outside towards his own desk.

"So kid, what's your name?" Chou asked.

"Kenji!" the young boy said proudly.

"The name's Chou," he said as he sat down outside of Saitou's office after closing the door. The boy looked at him queerly with his wide blue eyes.

"Broom-head?" the boy asked while pointing to his unruly hair.

"What?!" he yelled as he dramatically got up from his chair. He absolutely despised that nickname! If anything could piss him off, it was that nickname! But then again the man had always had a short temper, so Chou tried to calm himself down. He didn't want Saitou getting on his case and sending him on some other mission. "No, it's Chou," he said firmly.

Kenji looked up at him innocently, a little confused as he scratched his forehead with a finger. After a couple minutes, the boy attempted to say his name again. "Broomhead?"

"No!" he cried. Chou breathed in deeply as he made another attempt. He looked at the young boy in the eye and mouthed the words while exaggerating each sound, "CH- - - OU"

Kenji carefully repeated what he had said, "Ch—ou."

The man nodded. "Yeah Chou. Got it?"

"Yup! Got it broomhead," Kenji happily said as he clapped his hands.

The man narrowed his turquoise eyes as he looked at the boy. It took all of his willpower to hold back his anger and not pummel the boy. Man, if he was still working for Shishio, he wouldn't have a problem with getting rid of the kid, it was Battousai's progeny after all. But the guy was in hell and he couldn't exact any sort of harm on the boy unless he wanted to be thrown away in one of those cells. _Damn police!_, Chou murmured underneath his breath. But then again, the blonde haired man shivered, he _was_ Battousai's kid and there was no telling what the father would do if he found out that Chou had something to do with the kid's mysterious disappearance.

Chou eyed the young boy up and down. He knew he couldn't take much more of these insults. _From a bratty three-year old for godsakes_, the man angrily thought. _But I can't leave either or Saitou will have my fucking head._ Meanwhile, Kenji watched on the side with amusement at the man's features as they writhed in pain, anger, and indecision.

After a couple of minutes the little boy asked with concern laced over each word, "What's wrong, broomhead?"

It didn't take long for Chou to make a decision.

"To hell with this! I'm not gonna be some nanny for Saitou!" the man said as he got up angrily and walked away.

"Oro?" Kenji watched dumbstruck as the man grumpily left. Then the boy jumped from out of his seat and decided to do some exploring. His eyes brightened up as he saw that the door to Saitou's office was not fully closed. He stumbled into the room eyes brightly lit with mischievousness.

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Saitou took another puff of his cigarette as he walked back into the police station. He felt fully refreshed and put out his cigarette on an ashtray before walking into his office. As he approached, a dreadful feeling began to develop at the pit of his stomach. _Where is that broom head and the kid?_

His sixth sense told him that something was wrong. It was just too quiet and that Chou was never quiet. Never. He took a deep breath as he opened his door.

Saitou felt his heart skip a beat. His office was in a complete mess. Markers, spilled ink, papers, and books littered the entire room making it seem as if a tornado had targeted the place specifically. The three year old culprit stood in the middle of the room indulging at its sight. Only one phrase repeated in the man's mind.

"Aku. Soku. Zan."

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- To be continued

**Author's Notes**: Hope you enjoyed this chapter! Please read and review!


	2. The Wolf in Sheep's Clothing

**Disclaimer: **Rurouni Kenshin is the property of Nobuhiro Watsuki and Sony Productions.

**Author's Notes: **A 3 chapter mini story.

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**Saitou's Adventures in Babysitting**

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**Chapter 2**

**The Wolf in Sheep's Clothing**

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Saitou took another puff of his cigarette as he walked back into the police station. He felt fully refreshed and put out his cigarette on an ashtray before walking into his office. As he approached, a dreadful feeling began to develop at the pit of his stomach. _Where is that broom head and the kid?_

His sixth sense told him that something was wrong. It was just too quiet and that Chou was never quiet. Never. He took a deep breath as he opened his door.

Saitou felt his heart skip a beat. His office was in a complete mess. Markers, spilled ink, papers, and books littered the entire room making it seem as if a tornado had targeted the place specifically. The three year old culprit stood in the middle of the room indulging at its sight. Only one phrase repeated in the man's mind.

"Aku. Soku. Zan."

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The culprit who had sensed a hostile ki turned around slowly. Red hair and flared blue eyes matched those of the wolf as they looked at each other eye to eye.

"I drawing! For Aunt Tokio!" Kenji said happily as he displayed a drawing that he had just created. Streaks of black ink and finger prints were scattered throughout the white sheet of paper. Behind the marks were some fine printed Japanese characters. The man was brought out of his momentary trance and squinted his eyes for the writing seemed familiar. At that moment, Saitou saw to his horror that it was the form that he had been filling out since early that morning. Anger began to roll off of him like waves.

"Boy," he called out sternly with a fierce expression on his face.

The three year old child who was still drawing turned around slowly to meet his eyes and said calmly, "Not boy. My name is Kenji." He stood up proudly and puffed out his chest, a mannerism that developed when Uncle Hiko had baby-sat him sometime ago.

"Fine, .. Ken- - ji," Saitou drawled out with disdain. "You are going to sit in that chair and be quiet."

"Why?"

Saitou narrowed his eyes. "Because I gave you an order." The ex-Shinsengumi captain had no idea how to deal with younger kids. Why couldn't they just obey?

"Why?"

"Just sit down!" he said while firmly pointing a finger at the wooden chair in the corner. Who knew how meddlesome and irritating three year olds could be! He couldn't help but briefly wonder if his own son had caused Tokio much trouble in the past.

"O'tay," Kenji said in defeat as he lowered his head down, his bangs covering his eyes.

_Takuya could never have behaved so badly_, he thought as he watched the boy trudge over to the chair and plop himself down. But then again, he added as an afterthought, Tokio was so adamant about not having another child unless he was there to help take care of it. He sighed inwardly and looked over at the boy who was currently sitting down. Saitou then let out a small smirk of victory. If the boy were to sit there for the next two and a half hours, everything would go well and Tokio would come back and take the monster home. He was sure Tokio would understand if he told her that he had to do overtime at the police department for the rest of the weekend. _Or for however long until Battousai comes back and takes his spawn home_.

Saitou then surveyed the room with his wolf-like eyes. It was a complete disaster area. Books, shelves, papers, and other miscellaneous items were in complete disarray. Now who would he get to clean up this mess? This was indeed a time, if any, for a smoking break. The man then made his way towards his desk ready to break open a new pack of cigarettes when . .

_Kuso!_

His eyes widened in shock. One of the drawers was half-open. Cold sweat began to pour from Saitou's face as he frantically made his way over. A heavy feeling of dread began to develop within him. He rummaged through all the items anxiously searching for his emergency stash.

_Where the hell are my Novellas?_, he frantically questioned within his mind. They were his very last pack he had with him. He could have sworn he had stashed his favorite English imported cigarettes in his top drawer. Where were they? After a few more minutes of throwing items around his desk and opening and shutting other drawers, he realized the cold, hard truth. The man looked up from his desk to see the young boy sitting there quietly looking at his dangling feet.

"_What_ did you do with my cigarettes?" he sneered with a murderous look dancing in the yellows of his eyes.

Kenji shrugged his shoulders.

"I know you had something to do with it. Spill it boy."

Kenji looked at him with pure innocence in his blue eyes. The boy then motioned to his lips, shook his head, and mouthed the words, "_Can't talk_."

Saitou widened his eyes in outrage. He couldn't believe it! No man had ever been this disrespectful to him before. Not ever.

"Uncle Saitou, you said I can't talk so I no talk. I was quiet," Kenji said with confidence, not even a bit deterred from the look that Saitou was giving him. Any other man would have gotten on his knees and begged for mercy, but this was a three-year-old and Kenshin's son nonetheless, and three-year-olds knew not of the word 'fear'.

The man clenched his fists and ground his teeth tightly at the boy's confession. With one finger pointed at the middle of the boy's forehead, he said gruffly, "Just find them, boy."

Kenji sighed and nodded meekly as he hopped out of his chair. His little feet pitter-pattered across the carpeted floor towards the trash can. The boy then stopped and pointed to the contents within the garbage. A vile, acidic taste began to develop at the top of Saitou's throat as he strode towards the item in question. Once there, he looked ever so cautiously into the bag to see the contents within it. His face displayed mute horror at the sight.

Now there are three things in Saitou Hajime's life that he believed were most important to him.

The first was his motto "Aku. Soku. Zan." which meant "Slay. Evil. Swiftly." The wolf had stuck to that belief since he was a child and would continue to follow it until the day he died. There was nothing more truthful to him in life than his motto.

The second was his wife, Tokio. She was the companion that he had for life and she was the only person that truly understood him. With her, he had shared some of the happiest moments in his life and with her, he found everlasting love and support. She was irreplaceable.

The third was his nicotine. Yes, it was his ever so precious cigarettes. He would never confess that he had such an addiction to them, but he believed that they were some of the only things that could calm and clear his mind. Now, to see those cigarettes taken and destroyed was at the point of being almost gut-wrenching for the man to bear.

In the trash can was Saitou's brand new pack of _Novella_ cigarettes which were open and covered with ink and water. He could feel the breakfast in his stomach turning at the sight. He would not even be able to salvage one of precious cigarettes from the destruction the kid had caused. All of them were wasted.

The man frowned gravely as he shot a murderous glare at the young boy. Actually, Saitou corrected himself, the kid was not human in the first place. The vile, disgusting red-haired creature standing before him had to be none other than the spawn of the devil himself. _Someone that had to be taken care of_. His fingers ever so carefully began to make their way over to his katana and they silently stroked the cold, hard metal of the handle readying it for attack.

_"I'll be back for him in three hours_."

The voice of Tokio popped into the man's head as he began to unsheathe the sword. The shock of hearing his wife's voice brought him to the mortifying realization that his wife would be terribly upset at him if anything were to happen to the monster. After all, the devil had ever so cleverly deceived his Tokio into thinking that he was an angel. Saitou 'harrumphed' as he moved his hands away from the handle of the sword and closed his eyes as he breathed deeply in order to calm his quick-firing nerves. He opened them a minute later and his old expression returned.

"Now boy, why did you do this?" he asked while looking at the boy.

"Smoking bad," Kenji said while he shook his head at Saitou in an almost disapproving manner.

The man's stomach churned with irate anger. He could feel his temper rising yet again. He wondered for a moment if the Battousai was laughing at his predicament. The thought of it just made him sick. The great Saitou Hajime was being driven to lunacy because of a three-year-old brat.

_Wait a minute_, Saitou asked himself, _didn't that broomhead agree to look after the brat?_ _Where is that idiot? _The man looked at the three-year-old suspiciously through the corner of his eyes and found that Kenji was smiling at him. Saitou knew at that minute that there was something seriously wrong with Battousai's kid. It was nothing but pure evil.

The man then began to make his way back to his chair. He needed to sit down. With the broomhead gone, Saitou thought, there wouldn't be any other person left to look after the kid except for himself. He looked down at his watch in shock. It had only been a mere hour since Tokio had bade him good-bye. That meant that he had the devil for another two hours! He ground his teeth fiercely at the thought.

At that moment, a bright idea then popped into Saitou Hajime's head. Actually, according to Saitou, it wasn't just bright, it was _brilliant_. He smirked at the corner of his lips as he looked towards the child. He got up slowly and walked towards the door.

"Follow me, boy. I'll show you around."

Kenji widened his blue eyes in surprise and clapped his hands. "Rea'ry? (really?) I go with Uncle Saitou?" He paused as he crossed his arms in front of his chest. "Where we go?" he asked out of curiosity.

"To jail," Saitou said with a smirk.

"Jail? But otousan says that's for bad people," Kenji whined as he looked at the man with puppy dog eyes.

"Since you're a special little br- .. I mean boy, I thought that you'd like it," he said with a harmless smile. (A/N: You know that smile that Saitou has when he pretended to be a medicine man.)

"Oh. I see," Kenji said in a jolly voice as he dangled his two legs in excitement.

Saitou nodded as he opened the door wider to allow the child to go through first. As they walked past the desks, other officers couldn't help but give awkward looks between Saitou and the child. They had heard the commotion that had come from his office, but were too afraid to disturb the boss for fear of losing an arm or leg, literally.

"Hello!" Kenji said while waving happily as he walked by the other police men. They looked at the kid and sadly shook their heads. The little boy was too young to die. Kenji looked upon those officers queerly. What was wrong with them? He ran a few paces to catch up to Saitou who was a couple of steps in front and lightly tugged on his blue jacket with his chubby hand.

"Uncle Saitou, why they look sad?" Kenji asked with concern laced over his childish features as he pointed in the direction of the people behind them.

Saitou looked behind him towards the other officers. At seeing their boss, the others quickly went back to work.

The man shrugged as they continued along the way.

"Are we there yet?" the boy asked as he looked right and left at the surroundings around him in curiosity. Saitou didn't answer and the couple continued going further down the cold, desolate hall. Kenji shivered a little at the sight of the swaying lights above him.

Saitou reached for something in his pocket pulled it out. Some light was cast off of the object, and Kenji found it to be a set of keys. With a slight jingle, the door was opened. The older man gestured towards the little boy to go inside. Kenji looked at Saitou and nodded in understanding as he took a few cautious steps into the dark room.

_Slam_.

Kenji spun around on his heels in a frightened state and saw that his 'uncle' had locked him in behind bars.

"How long I be in here?"

"As long as I want you to be in there," he said with a smirk as he tucked the keys safely back into his coat pocket.

"How long is that?"

"When I come back and open the door again," he said.

"Oh."

After Saitou answered, he began to walk away with a certain kind of feeling of victory that he hadn't felt in years. There was no way that the abominable kid could do anything when he was locked behind bars. Even though he knew that Kenji couldn't do much, he couldn't help but have a nagging feeling in the back of his head that told him that he wasn't out of the woods yet, at least not entirely.

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- To be continued

**Author's Notes:**

Please read and review! Thanks much!


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